Meanwhile... next door...

“I can’t believe I got talked into this,” Nakago mumbled. (He does a lot of that in our parodies, doesn’t he.) He looked down at his electric blue swim trunks. Soi had bought them for him. “This is the last time I let her go shopping for me.”

Soi came running outside. “Nakago, don’t look so depressed! This is going to be so much fun!” She was wearing a bathing suit that was, amazingly, more skimpy than Miaka’s. Nakago’s eyes widened slightly.

“Can you wear that in public?” Tomo goggled, walking over to the pair (and admiring Nakago’s . . . physique . . . while he was at it).

“I am now, right?” Soi said. “I wonder what’s taking everyone else so long.” She looked at Tomo approvingly. “I like those swim trunks, Tomo. They match your makeup perfectly.”

“I suppose I’ll have to take it off,” Tomo sighed. He saw the look on Nakago’s face and added quickly, “the makeup, not the swimsuit. I’ll do that once Yui-sama is out of the bathroom.”

“Where are Miboshi and Ashitare?” Nakago asked Soi.

“I don’t know. They didn’t show up.”

(GOOD!)

Amiboshi and Suboshi walked out wearing matching navy swim trunks. (Kouri’s turn to drool . . . ) “Where’s Yui-sama?” Suboshi asked eagerly.

“Still changing,” Soi told him.

Suboshi sighed.

“And no, you can’t go watch,” Tomo added.

Suboshi sighed again. Amiboshi whacked him over the head with his flute.

“Why are you carrying that thing?” Suboshi asked him curiously, rubbing his head. “This is a pool party.”

“Oh, yeah,” Amiboshi said. “I forgot I still had it. I’ll go put it with my stuff.” He disappeared back into the house.

Yui walked outside, wearing a bikini that was quite sedate compared to what Soi and Miaka were wearing (which made Soi and Miaka’s outfits all the more impressive, if you consider that Yui wasn’t wearing much).

Suboshi’s eyes grew to the size of beach balls. “Y-Y-Y-Y-Yui- sama,” he managed to say. “I-I-I like . . . I like what you . . . what you’re wearing. Really. It . . . you look great.”

“Wipe the drool off your face, Suboshi,” Tomo said.

Suboshi nodded.

“He’s far gone,” Tomo muttered. Soi and Nakago nodded.

Yui backed away a little. “Um . . . thanks, Suboshi.”

Amiboshi came back outside. Yui’s swimsuit was even more impressive from the back. He stopped dead in his tracks, turned bright red, and then walked over to his brother. “Ano . . . Shun-chan?”

“Forget it,” Soi said. “He’s not going to be capable of intelligent conversation for the next year and a half.”

Amiboshi sighed, considered his options, and decided there was only one way to snap Suboshi out of it. He pushed his twin into the swimming pool.

Suboshi came up sputtering. “What was that for?” he asked indignantly.

“Wow, he’s coherent,” Soi smirked.

Suboshi glared. “Why wouldn’t I be coherent? I -- “ He looked over at Yui. “Yui-sama . . .”

Promptly, Suboshi sank to the bottom of the pool. Amiboshi sighed, dove in, and rescued his brother. “Maybe you’d better stay out of the pool until you’ve adjusted to the idea of Yui-sama in a bikini.”

Suboshi nodded and lifted himself out of the pool, where the others let him stare in peace.

“Well, are we going swimming or what?” Soi asked. Mindful of her suit, she lowered herself carefully into the pool. (Not like any meatball-headed Mikos we could name.)

“That’s why we’re here,” Tomo said, also getting in.

Nakago sat down on the edge of the pool (not near Suboshi) and put his feet in. Amiboshi jumped in. Yui also carefully lowered herself in. Once she was submerged up to her neck, and Suboshi couldn’t see anything, he decided it was safe to get in and not drown.

“There sure is a lot of noise coming from next door,” Amiboshi remarked. “Wonder what’s going on.”

*******************

Tamahome looked at Nuriko and waved him over. “Hey,” he said. “Tasuki’s asleep.”

Nuriko’s eyes lit up. “Really?”

Tamahome nodded, grinning evilly. The two of them got out of the pool and crept over.

“Tamahome-san, what are you doing?” Chiriko called.

“Shhhhh!” Nuriko hissed. Tamahome waved frantically for Chiriko to be quiet.

“On the count of three,” Tamahome mouthed. “One . . .”

Nuriko resisted the urge to cackle.

“Two . . .”

Hotohori leaned against the edge of the pool. “This I’ve got to see.” The others looked on with interest. Nuriko took a position by Tasuki’s side.

“Three!” Nuriko and Tamahome grabbed Tasuki and hauled him up.

“FUCK!” Tasuki awoke screaming.

Mitsukake covered Chiriko’s ears.

“SACRIFICE TO THE POOL GODS!” Tamahome yelled.

“WHAT FUCKING POOL GODS?!” Tasuki shouted. He struggled violently.

SPLASH!!!

Tasuki sank like a rock.

“Ano . . .” Tamahome said. “He’s not coming up . . .”

“Nice going na no da,” Chichiri said, going to the rescue.

“Baka, he can’t swim,” Nuriko said.

“Well, why didn’t you say that?!” Tamahome yelled.

“I thought you already knew!” Nuriko shouted back.

“Well, I forgot!” Tamahome pushed Nuriko into the pool.

“Oh, he shouldn’t have done that,” Hotohori sighed.

A dripping, indignant Nuriko climbed out of the pool as Chichiri towed Tasuki into the shallow end. Tasuki watched in enjoyment as Nuriko picked up Tamahome.

“Oi, Hotohori-sama,” Nuriko called. “Will you give me a hand?”

Hotohori climbed out of the pool, snickering. “What do I have to do?”

Nuriko walked to the end of the diving board and lowered Tamahome into the pool feet-first so he was dangling half-in, half-out of the water. “Hold him like this.”

Hotohori sat on the diving board and took hold of Tamahome’s forearms.

Nuriko jumped in next to Tamahome and yelled, “TICKLE TORTURE!”

“We’ll just watch, thank you,” Mitsukake said.

“TAMAHOME!” Miaka shrieked.

Tamahome writhed in agony as Nuriko tickled him mercilessly. “Nuriko, stop! I’m sorry I pushed you in! Please stop!”

Nuriko sighed. “I suppose . . . if you promise to be good.”

“I promise,” Tamahome whimpered.

Hotohori dropped him.

*************************************

“FUCK!”

Tasuki’s yell as he was seized for the sacrifice echoed for blocks around. All the Seiryuus looked up in momentary confusion. “Was that . . . Tasuki?” Amiboshi asked hesitantly.

"WHAT FUCKING POOL GODS?!”

“That was Tasuki, all right,” Soi said, nodding. “Can’t mistake that kind of language.”

The Seiryuus listened in interest to the loud yelling and splashing that followed. “Someone’s getting the shit kicked out of them,” Suboshi said, grinning. He liked the thought of a Suzaku Seishi getting the shit kicked out of him.

“TAMAHOME!”

"That was definitely Miaka,” Tomo said.

Yui got out of the pool. Amiboshi quickly clapped a hand over his brother’s eyes before Suboshi sank to the bottom of the pool. Yui walked over to the fence.

“Miaka?”

There was a brief silence. Then they heard, “Yui-chan?” Miaka got out of the pool and walked over to the fence. “YUI-CHAN!”

“What are you doing here?” Yui asked.

“We’re having a party,” Miaka explained the obvious. “But they’re beating up on Tamahome.”

Suboshi snickered.

“Why don’t you guys come over?” Miaka asked eagerly. “We’re going to have a barbecue later. There’s plenty for everybody.”

“Not the way you eat,” Tasuki muttered.

Nakago rolled his eyes, not enjoying the thought of having to put up with the Suzakus. Yui probably wouldn’t let him kill anyone.

“That sounds great,” Yui said. “Come on, guys!” She opened the fence gate and strolled through.

The Suzakus looked up. Tamahome choked. “Yui . . . that bathing suit . . . it’s . . . it’s . . .”

“Smaller than Miaka’s,” Chiriko observed.

“Well, not quite no da,” Chichiri said. “Just very close no da.”

Yui turned and waved at her seishi. “Come on, guys!”

Reluctantly, the Seiryuu Seishi started hauling themselves out of the pool. “Do we have to?” Suboshi whined.

Yui glared at him.

Amiboshi was the first to sigh and walk through the gate. “Um . . . hi.”

“Ohayo, Amiboshi-san,” Chiriko said cheerfully. He was the only one being cheerful, excluding the Mikos.

The other Seiryuu Seishis dragged themselves over to the Suzaku party. They stood just inside the yard in a bunch.

“Well, don’t be shy,” Miaka said. “Come on in, it’s okay.”

Soi sighed and walked out of the crowd and into the yard. Everyone goggled.

“Now that really is smaller than Miaka’s,” Chiriko observed.

Nuriko’s eyebrows raised all the way to his hairline. “You know, if you subtracted Miaka’s bathing suit from Yui’s, I think that’s what would be left.”

Soi scowled in their general direction. “Nakago likes my bathing suit. Right, Nakago?”

Nakago studiously ignored the whole lot of them. He appropriated Tasuki’s lawn chair.

Tasuki started to say something, then decided his life was worth too much to start yelling at the Shogun. He sat on the steps of the pool.

Suboshi mumbled something unmentionable and walked over to the steps. “Do you mind?” he asked, glaring at Tasuki. “I’m trying to get in.”

Tasuki glared back. “By all means,” he said, scooting over.

Suboshi started down the steps.

Tasuki grabbed his ankle, sending Suboshi pitching head-long into the pool. Suboshi came up bright red. “YOU FUCKING -- “ He caught sight of Yui. “You . . .” He began to sputter incoherently.

“What’s the matter, Yui got your tongue?” Tasuki asked innocently.

Nuriko cackled. “Doesn’t he wish!”

Suboshi turned, if possible, even more red. Amiboshi decided it was high time he came to his twin’s rescue. He did this by cannonballing next to Nuriko’s head and sending both of them under. By the time Nuriko had surfaced, Amiboshi was a safe distance away, having dragged his twin along with him.

In time, everyone had settled back into the pool as peacefully as the situation allowed. Then Miaka said cheerily, “Let’s play a game!”

There was a collective groan.

“Chicken fights!” Tamahome yelled.

Another collective groan.

“Pair up!” Miaka shouted, latching onto Tamahome’s arm.

“I’ll be referee no da!” Chichiri said quickly.

“You just want to get out of it,” Tasuki accused.

“Daaaa . . . well, maybe . . .”

Soi immediately glomped onto Nakago. “You’ll be my partner, right, Nakago?”

Nakago looked around. Well, considering my other options . . . “All right.”

Soi cheered gleefully.

“You’ll go with me, right, Shun-chan?” Amiboshi said, looking at his brother, who was eyeing Yui speculatively.

“Yui-sama . . .”

“You’ll go with me,” Amiboshi repeated patiently.

“Yui-sama . . .”

“GET OVER HERE!” Amiboshi yelled.

Suboshi grumbled and trudged over to where his brother standing.

Yui looked around at who was left on her side. If she couldn’t have Tamahome, she actually wouldn’t mind Suboshi. Especially considering the only other Seiryuu left was . . . was . . .

Tasuki saw Yui staring wide-eyed and panicked at Tomo. He sighed, feeling his soft spot for women kick in. (Yes, he does have one. So there.) “Ano, Yui . . . do you want to pair up with me?”

Yui quickly grabbed his arm. “Doumo arigatou gozaimashita!”

“I guess I’ll sit out, too,” Tomo said, sighing and looking at Nakago. “Since we’ll have an odd number.”

Everyone present breathed a sigh of relief.

Chiriko smiled up at Mitsukake hopefully. “Take care of me, Mitsukake-san.”

Mitsukake smiled back.

Nuriko looked at Hotohori with starry eyes. “I guess that puts the two of us together, doesn’t it?”

“Poor Hotohori-sama,” Tamahome muttered.

“Hey!” Nuriko glared. “I heard that! You’ll pay for it!”

“So, first up is Nuriko and Hotohori versus Tamahome and Miaka no da?” Chichiri asked.

“Who should go on the bottom?” Hotohori asked.

“I will,” Nuriko said. “I’m the super strong one.”

Tamahome had already submerged and was trying to hold his breath while Miaka had considerable trouble getting on.

Nuriko ducked underwater and tried to contain his bliss as Hotohori climbed up onto his shoulders.

“They’re going to be as misbalanced as all hell,” Tasuki muttered.

“Yeah, but look at who they’re fighting,” Amiboshi said.

“Good point,” Tasuki said.

The two teams emerged from the water.

“Ready no da?” Chichiri asked. “Go!”

Miaka fell off.

The others stared. Tamahome turned around and hauled Miaka out of the water.

“Baka,” Nuriko said. “We didn’t even touch you!”

“You didn’t need to,” Tasuki said, laughing so hard he nearly fell over.

Miaka pouted. “Does that mean we lose?”

“Yes, damn it, we lost,” Tamahome mumbled.

Miaka sniffled. “I’m sorry, Tamahome!”

Tamahome rolled his eyes. “Never mind. It’s okay. Forget about it.”

“Who’s next no da?” Chichiri asked, as Hotohori and Nuriko wavered and nearly fell.

Nobody said a word.

“We’ll go, I guess,” Amiboshi said.

Suboshi sighed, rolled his eyes, and said, “I’ll go on the bottom. I’m stronger.”

Amiboshi nodded. Suboshi ducked underwater and his twin climbed onto his shoulders. Suboshi straightened up and brushed his sopping hair out of his eyes. “Ready, Aniki?”

“Ready,” Amiboshi answered.

Chichiri looked at Nuriko and Hotohori. “You ready no da?”

Hotohori nodded.

“Go!”

Suboshi waded over to where Nuriko and Hotohori were wobbling. Do we even need to touch them? “Fire when ready, Aniki,” he said, planting his feet firmly.

Amiboshi reached out and tentatively shoved on Hotohori’s shoulder.

Hotohori pitched backwards, flailing frantically. Nuriko held his shins firmly, but all he succeeded in doing was going with him when he fell over.

“We win!” Suboshi crowed, looking over to see if Yui had seen his triumph.

Yui smiled at him. “Congratulations.”

Suboshi blinked and turned neon red. “Yui-sama . . .”

“I think we better sit the next one out,” Amiboshi said. “We’d have an unfair disadvantage because my brother’s brain has melted.”

Suboshi nodded, grinning idiotically.

“Let me down,” Amiboshi instructed gently.

Suboshi nodded again and ducked underwater. Amiboshi climbed down.

“Who’s next no da?” Chichiri asked.

“We’ll go,” Soi said, eager for the chance to climb onto Nakago’s shoulders.

Nakago sighed resignedly and ducked underwater.

“They’ll be overbalanced too,” Tasuki said. “Soi’s too tall.”

Chiriko tugged on Mitsukake’s sleeve. “Can we go? Can we?”

Mitsukake smiled. “Okay.” He gently picked up Chiriko and lifted him onto his shoulders. “You all set?”

Chiriko nodded excitedly. “Hai!”

“Everyone ready no da?” Chichiri asked. He was having a good time with this. He received four nods in answer. “Okay, go!”

There was a minute of cautious circling, then the two men charged at each other. Soi was a bit too high and had to aim downward to reach Chiriko. Chiriko examined his options, then reached out and began to tickle Soi.

“Hey!” Soi cried out. “No fair!” She started to giggle uncontrollably. “No tickling!”

Nakago did his best, but a few seconds later, Soi pitched backwards off his back. Nakago helped her up and tried to disguise the fact that he wasn’t really disappointed that he’d lost.

“Do you want to fight now?” Yui asked Tasuki hesitantly.

He shrugged. “I guess. If you want to.”

Yui nodded and waited.

Tasuki turned red. “I’m not ducking underwater,” he said.

Yui rolled her eyes and shoved him under. A few seconds later, a sputtering Tasuki came up, with Yui firmly seated on his shoulders.

“We’ll go again,” Amiboshi said.

Suboshi hesitated. “Ano, Aniki . . . I don’t want to fight Yui- sama.”

“Shun-chan, it’s just a chicken fight. Don’t worry about it.”

Suboshi looked at Yui for approval. She smiled. That was good enough for him. He ducked underwater and let Amiboshi climb up.

“Ready no da? Go!”

Suboshi approached Tasuki and Yui cautiously, half-afraid that if his brother touched Yui, her bathing suit would fall off.

Tasuki approached just as cautiously, knowing that Suboshi wanted to pay him back for making him fall into the pool.

Yui and Amiboshi grabbed each other’s forearms and began a (gasp!) normal chicken fight. After a few minutes of struggling, the less balanced twins went pitching backwards into the pool.

“K’so!” Suboshi cursed, coming up for air. “That’s it!” He looked at Amiboshi meaningfully. Amiboshi grinned. The two simultaneously ducked underwater, grabbed Tasuki’s ankles, and yanked.

Tasuki went pitching backwards, Yui going with him.

All four of them came up sputtering. Both of the twins were laughing. Tasuki immediately launched himself at Suboshi.

“Ano!” Chichiri cried. “The game’s over, no da!”

Suboshi grabbed Tasuki by the shoulders, shoved him underwater, and held him there.

“Don’t drown him, baka!” Nuriko yelled.

Amiboshi grabbed his brother and pulled him off Tasuki.

“The fight’s over no da!” Chichiri yelled. “I’m the referee and I say so! So there no da!”

Suboshi grumbled and returned to his corner of the pool.

“You’re just mad because you lost,” Tamahome said, snickering at Suboshi.

Suboshi prepared to go into full ballistic mode when Yui said, “Suboshi, calm down.”

Suboshi made the mistake of looking over at her. Then, de-brained, he did as she said.

“He’s calm enough to melt,” Tomo remarked.

“So, that makes the championship between Tasuki and Yui and Mitsukake and Chiriko, right no da?” Chichiri asked, glad he hadn’t needed to get between any violent fighters.

“Right,” Chiriko said. He’d stayed on Mitsukake’s shoulders so he could get a better view of the fights.

“They’re pretty evenly matched,” Hotohori said.

Nuriko nodded. “This should be interesting.”

“Interesting is one word for it,” Tomo said.

“Ready no da?”

“Hold on, Chiriko,” Mitsukake advised.

Chiriko grabbed a handful of Mitsukake’s hair. (Awwww...)

Yui looked nervously at the healer. “He wouldn’t . . .”

Tasuki eyed Mitsukake. “Naah. He wouldn’t.”

(Yes. He would.)

“Go!”

Mitsukake charged. Chiriko cheered. “Full speed ahead!”

Tasuki turned pale. “Ohhhh, shit.”

They never had a chance. Mitsukake simply plowed into them and ran them over.

“We win!” Chiriko cheered gleefully. “Wai wai!”

He was so cute that even the Seiryuus didn’t grumble.

After a while of sitting around staring at each other, Tamahome said, "Um, now what?"

"Volleyball!" Tasuki yelled. "That's something I can play!"

Suboshi snickered. "Hammer."

"Hey! I heard that!"

"So come and get me!" Suboshi called, treading water in the deep end.

Tasuki looked pleadingly at Nuriko. "Can I call in a favor?"

"I don't think I owed you anything," Nuriko said. "But you can anyway."

"Ohhhh shit," Suboshi said. "Aniki, protect me!"

Tasuki grabbed Amiboshi around the shoulders. "Not a chance in hell, yo-yo boy!"

"Sorry," Amiboshi called. "You're on your own for this."

Nuriko swam over to Suboshi and dragged him out of the pool kicking and screaming. The other Seiryuus watched with amused detachment while the other Suzakus snickered. Nuriko picked up Suboshi by his ankles and started dunking his head in the pool.

Amidst many bubbles, Suboshi managed to cry, "Stop! I yield, you win! Lemme go!"

"My pleasure," Nuriko said, and dropped him.

"Thank you," Tasuki said. "I feel much better now." He let go of Amiboshi, who swam over and fished his brother out of the pool.

"So," Soi said, "Are we going to play volleyball or not?"

"Sure no da," Chichiri said. "Seiryuu versus Suzaku no da?"

"Not enough of us," Tomo said.

"Yeah, and your nails would pop the beach ball," Tamahome said.

"Who's playing?" Hotohori asked.

Eventually, it was decided that the teams actually could be Suzaku versus Seiryuu, because Chiriko and Mitsukake decided to sit out. Neither of the Mikos were playing. Suboshi was extremely disappointed by this. "C'mon, Yui-sama, please play."

"I don't want to put my bathing suit through that," Yui stated.

"That's the only reason he wants you to play!" Tasuki cackled.

Yui paled. "I'll just sit down. Maybe I'll start cooking or something."

"I'll help!" Miaka cried eagerly.

"Oh, God," Tasuki muttered.

"But Yui-sama," Suboshi whined. "If Soi can do it, so can you!"

"Soi's bathing suit stays on better," Tomo said. "She's better . . . proportioned for it."

"Hey!" Soi and Yui both cried.

Suboshi looked at Yui with big shiny eyes. "Can I beat him up for you? Please please please?!"

"Well . . . okay."

"Um, maybe we should just get the game started no da," Chichiri interrupted hastily. "Blood is so hard to get out of swimming pools no da."

Suboshi sighed, trying to decide.

"You can beat him up later," Yui told him.

Suboshi brightened. "KAY!"

"Okay, let's get the game started," Tamahome said. They arranged themselves on sides.

"Can I be referee?" Chiriko asked.

"Okay," Tamahome answered.

"We get to serve first," Nuriko said.

"Why?" Soi asked.

"Because I'm holding the ball," Nuriko answered.

"Oh."

Nuriko served the ball, and the game began. It was fairly civilized until a high ball nearly made it over Tasuki's head. He couldn't reach it, so he pulled out his tessen and whaled it.

"Um, that would be a foul," Chiriko said.

"Awwww . . ." Tasuki moaned.

Tamahome grabbed it. "Would you get rid of this thing?"

Tasuki glared. "That thing is my tessen! Now give it back! You're just sore 'cause Taitsuu-kun didn't give you anything!"

"Okay, that's it!" Tamahome chucked the tessen into the deep end, where Tasuki watched it sink in dismay.

"TAMAHOME!! I don't need that thing to kick the crap out of you!"

"Try it, hammer!"

"Hey, if they're killing each other, can I kill Tomo now?" Suboshi asked.

"Absolutely not no da!"

Mitsukake waded into the pool and grabbed Tamahome by the ponytail and Tasuki by the shirt. "Cut it out."

Tasuki squeaked, remembering the chicken fight. "Okay. Okay."

Tamahome glared. "Let go, that hurts."

Mitsukake let both of them go and got out of the pool.

Suboshi swam into the deep end, ducked underwater, and retrieved the tessen. "So what should I do with this thing, Aniki?" he called.

"GIVE ME THAT!" Tasuki yelled.

"Be nice to me and maybe I will," Suboshi replied, treading water.

"We're supposed to be playing volleyball no da!" Chichiri said sternly. With a poof, the tessen disappeared from Suboshi's hand and reappeared on the side of the pool next to Tasuki.

"Thank you, Chichiri," Tasuki said indignantly.

"Just don't kill Tamahome with it no da," Chichiri said with a sigh.

Suboshi swam back to the shallow end and stood around looking irritated. "Let's just get back to the fucking game."

"It's our turn to serve," Soi said, grabbing the ball. Soi's serve went easily into Suzaku territory, as her vigorous motion caused momentary distraction among her opponents.

"No fair!" Tamahome cried. "She should have to wear a T-shirt!"

"Well, what do you think, Chiriko?" Hotohori asked. "You're the referee."

Chiriko shrugged innocently. "Well, if you guys say so . . . I don't see what the big deal is, though."

"There! He said I can wear it!" Soi cried triumphantly.

"That is not what he said!" Tasuki yelled.

"Oh, well, let's just get on with things," Tamahome grumbled, sensing that he wasn't going to win the fight.

"Why are you looking, anyway, Tamahome?" Nuriko asked. "Miaka isn't enough of a woman for ya?"

"HEY!" Tamahome yelled.

"Everyone just stop fighting no da!" Chichiri yelled. "We haven't gotten three serves in a row because of all the arguing no da!"

"Well, what do you expect?" Amiboshi asked. "Look who you're dealing with."

"Hmmm. Good point no da."

From there on, the game just went downhill. Chiriko had to reprimand Nakago twice for using chi blasts to direct the ball. Nuriko's spikes kept popping the ball. Chichiri kept making the ball disappear in the air and reappear floating in the water on the Seiryuu side. The Seiryuu twins made a good team, as they knew exactly when to set the ball up for each other.

At one point, Tomo hit the ball over the net, and then the Suzakus suddenly had twelve of them to deal with. Needless to say, the Seiryuus scored a point. Actually, they scored three of them.

Mass confusion was caused when Hotohori leapt for a high serve, lost his balance, and landed on Nuriko. Nuriko proceeded to melt into the pool. Amiboshi was heard to mutter, "And I thought my brother would be the only one we'd have to fish out after his brain had melted." Several red-faced, stuttering apologies later, the game resumed.

The score was tied fifteen for both teams when Yui called, "Guys! The food's ready!"

There was immediately a stampede for the stairs. Most of the smaller people ended up somewhere on the bottom.

Food was quickly devoured. What wasn't devoured (like what Miaka had made) was thrown at whoever happened to be standing close by. At one point, Tasuki found a particularly rancid looking bowl of what was supposed to be potato salad and looked around eagerly. "Where's that little Seiryuu psycho?"

Everyone paused in the fight and looked around.

"That's a good question," Hotohori said.

"Come to think of it, both twins vanished towards our yard a few minutes ago," Yui said.

"Uh oh," Tamahome said.

"What do you think they're plotting?" Nuriko asked. "Other than the obvious revenge against Tasuki?"

Before anyone could come up with an answer, they heard, "ATTAAAAACCCCKKK!!!"

"Huh?" Everyone turned around to see both twins running towards them, carrying a super soaker in each hand.

"Gaak!" Tasuki grabbed Yui and used her as a shield. "Ha! You won't shoot your Yui-sama, right?"

"No, but I will," Amiboshi said, taking careful aim.

"Hey! No fair!" Tasuki ditched his shield and ran for the bowl of 'potato salad.'

"You okay, Yui-sama?" Suboshi asked, running past.

Yui blinked. "Um, sure."

"Aniki, duck!" Suboshi yelled.

"Huh?" Amiboshi turned around just in time to see the potato salad. He ducked and it hit Nakago instead.

"Ohhhhhhh fuck," Tasuki moaned.

Nakago examined his clothing distastefully.

"Let me handle this, Nakago-sama," Soi said cheerfully.

At that moment, Nuriko came running out with the hose. "HA! I've got you now, Seiryuu twins!"

Both twins whirled around, only to get soaked by Nuriko's hose.

"No fair!" Suboshi yelled.

"Like sneaking into your yard to get supersoakers was fair no da," Chichiri pointed out.

"Well, no, but . . ." Amiboshi began.

"Good point, but is this fair?" Suboshi picked up a bowl of 'pudding' (also made by Miaka) and chucked it at Chichiri. It hit him square in the face.

"Na no da . . ."

Nuriko washed him off with the hose.

Chichiri glared at Suboshi. "Okay no da. It's time for some payback no da!"

Suboshi found himself sailing through the air, right into the deep end.

Chichiri smirked.

Hotohori was standing around trying to look peaceful when he found a bowl of 'cheese dip' came flying through the air at him. He managed to duck just in time, then stood looking for the culprit.

"Who did that?" he demanded.

"Tamahome," Nuriko told him.

Hotohori cracked his knuckles and started towards Tamahome.

"It wasn't me," Tamahome said, attempting to look innocent and doing a really bad job.

"Suuuuuure," Nuriko said.

Hotohori grabbed Tamahome by the arm and started dragging him towards the food.

"Hey! Where are you taking me? What are you doing?! Ow! Lemme go!"

Hotohori managed to get Tamahome to the table, then shoved his face into the punch bowl. (It was real punch, made by Yui.)

"Okay, okay," a feminine voice said. "This is getting out of hand. Tasuki's going to get toasted by Soi, Suboshi's going to get demolished by Chichiri, and Tamahome is going to be drowned by Hotohori. Of course, the last isn't necessarily a bad thing, but then Hotohori will get arrested and it just won't be good. We are putting an end to this right now."

Everyone looked over as three girls appeared at the end of the pool.

"Oh no, not them," Nuriko moaned.

"Yep, it's us," Kouri said, nodding cheerfully. "Your distinguished co-authors."

"Who're they?" Miaka asked.

"You're happier not knowing," Mitsukake rumbled. "Ignorance is bliss."

"So that explains why Miaka's always in such a good mood!" Chiriko said brightly.

Everyone sweat-dropped.

Kimura ran over and stood in front of Tasuki, glaring at Soi fiercely. "Don't hurt my Tasuki-chan!"

Soi squeaked and ducked behind Nakago. "Don't let them hurt me . . . guys don't scare me, but I know better than to mess with the co-authors."

"Especially these co-authors," Tamahome grumbled, pulling out of Hotohori's grasp.

"Sorry, Hotohori-sama," Yume said. "But you have to let Tamahome go. But if you want, we can kill him later."

Hotohori looked hopeful. "Is that a promise?"

"Neechan! No killing!" Kouri yelled.

"But Hotohori-sama wants it . . ."

"No matter how much Hotohori wants it. You don't see me trying to kill Tomo"

Suboshi climbed out of the pool and edged away from her nervously. "Not these chicks. Geez, and people call me psycho."

Kouri burst into tears. "Shun-chan . . . you're mean!"

Meanwhile, Kimura was drooling over Tasuki. "Tasuki-chan . . . you're so . . ."

"Well-formed?" Yume supplied.

"Try sopping," Tamahome suggested, drying off his face.

Kimura glared and glomped onto him. "He's my Tasuki, and I say he's hot!"

Tasuki sweat-dropped.

Kouri had wandered into the corner of the yard, still crying. "Nobody likes me! At least Kimura got to glomp onto Tasuki and Yume got a conversation with Hotohori . . ."

Amiboshi walked over to her. "Are you okay?" he asked hesitantly.

"No. Everybody's mean."

"Don't mind Shun-chan. He's just like that."

Kouri sighed melodramatically, drying her tears. "Yeah, I know. We already set the story up for him to get Yui, too . . ." She glanced at him sideways. "Can I have you instead?"

Amiboshi paled. "Ano . . ."

"No, never mind. Unless I'm wrong, this is just a cameo. Right, Kimura?" Kouri looked across the yard.

"WHAT?!" Kimura squeaked, clinging tighter to Tasuki.

"Not unless you plan on bringing Tasuki to the hospital for surgical removal," Yume said.

Kimura stuck her tongue out.

"Ano, Tasuki's mouth is up there," Kouri directed. She turned to Amiboshi. "'Kay, I guess we're here for a while." She put an arm around his waist and dragged him over to the pool. "Look, in FY no da I get Chichiri – "

"Huh no da?" Chichiri asked, looking startled.

"And in most of the rest of the stories, I get my Shun-chan, so I figured it's time to give you a chance."

"Um . . . thanks. I'm flattered. Really . . ."

"Don't think I can't see through you," Kouri said. "It's okay, I'm the co-author. I'm supposed to be able to do cool shit like that."

"So now what?" Tamahome asked, looking around uncertainly. "Where's Miaka?"

"Hey, the co-authors appeared, so we know something bad has to have happened to her," Tomo said.

"Miaka is . . . elsewhere," Yume said, grinning like the Cheshire cat.

Kouri glared. "Neechaaaaaaan . . . what'd you do to Miaka? Mind you, it's not that I object, but still . . ."

"But it was so satisfying to just go poof, she's gone!" Yume said.

"You did WHAT?!" Tamahome yelled.

"Hmmm . . . Really?" Kouri asked. She pointed at Tamahome. He disappeared with a poof. "You're right, that is satisfying."

"I would have defended you," Hotohori said to Yume in a low voice.

Yume gaped, turning the color of a tomato.

"Let me try, let me try!" Kimura said, letting go of Tasuki and jumping up and down. She pointed at Tomo. He disappeared. "WAI WAI!! That's awesome!" She threw her arms around Tasuki's waist. "Is there anyone I should make disappear, Tasuki-chan?"

Tasuki considered. "How about – "

"If you say Suboshi, I'll turn you into a newt and step on you," Kouri said with a pleasant smile.

"Never mind," Tasuki eeped.

Kimura glared at Kouri. "Don't hurt Tasuki!"

Kouri shrugged. "Make him stop saying nasty things about my Shun-chan."

"He's not your Shun-chan for this story," Yume reminded her.

"Good point," Kouri said, looking at Suboshi speculatively.

Suboshi paled and hid behind Yui.

"Oh, fine," Kouri said. "You can have Yui for this story, but I get you next time!"

"Hey, I'm not good enough for you?" Amiboshi asked, looking hurt.

Kouri whimpered. "Nooooo . . ." She threw her arms around Amiboshi's neck, nearly choking him. "I love you, Kou-chan."

Amiboshi turned bright red.

"Hey!" Kimura shouted. "Stop stop stop! If you get a mushy scene with Amiboshi, I get a mushy scene with Tasuki!"

Kouri blinked. "It's not enough that your arms are permanently attached to his waist?"

"No, I want a mushy scene!"

"Fine, fine. I'll do what I can." She pointed at Tasuki and snapped her fingers. "You're in love with Kimura now," she informed him.

"I am?" he asked. "Oh, I am. Right." He looked at Kimura with big, sparkly eyes.

Kimura squeaked and kissed him fully on the mouth.

"Okay, enough of that," Yume said. "What about me?"

"Look, he said he would protect you. What else do you want from the guy?" Kouri asked.

"Imooto-chan, you're so innocent!"

Kouri eeped and hid her face in Amiboshi's shoulder. "See, the hentai stuff is all her fault!"

"Well, whatever hentai stuff you're looking for, you're not getting it," Nuriko said.

Yume stuck her tongue out at him.

"Geez, I was just joking, people," Yume said. "You're all so quick to assume things . . ."

"Never mind," Kouri said. "Well, is the story over yet?"

"I dunno. Have we beaten up everyone we need to beat up?"

"I think so," Kouri said. She mentally reviewed the story. "Yeah, we've beaten everyone up. And had everyone fall for everyone they're supposed to." She glared in Suboshi's general direction, and he kissed Yui's cheek. Surprisingly, Yui didn't pull away or make any disgusted noises.

"Okay. I guess we're done then," Kimura said. "We really can work co-author magic."

"Hey, wait wait!" Yume cried. "I didn't get what I wanted!"

Hotohori hugged her.

Yume stared up at him with dreamy eyes. "Okay . . . now we can end it."

"Since all of our brains have melted," Kimura said, snuggling up to Tasuki.

"Be nice," Hotohori said.

Kouri leaned her head on Amiboshi's shoulder. "Okay. I hereby pronounce this the end."

And so it was.

FY Fanfics
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